Marcia the Mushroom - 26 Apr 2016

"Comatose, I was!" reveals Marcia the Mushroom, an otherwise derelict suburban housewife and mother to 9.7 million spores from Nunawading, Vic. She is describing her mood on Friday after, she freely admits, she "knocked a few ones back" in a silent but drunken tribute to the artiste formerly living as Prince. "How can they keep me standing, alone in a world so cold?" Marcia demanded. "Why do we scream at each other?" she went on. Why indeed. "Dream if you can a courtyard - an ocean of violets in bloom." There's something in that for all of us. "Touch if you will my stomach, feel how it trembles inside," she digressed. Icky. 

 

Marcia's growing sense of despondency was lifted however when she came to, and found out about Thursday's $25 million  Powerball, which she believed had the power to transform her life and her growing megalopolis of offspring. "It's getting so nice and damp at the moment, my spores are having no difficulty sprouting. Why, I've got more front than Myer's now!" she revealed, talking about a now nearly-forgotten chain of Department stores. "With all that moolah I could possibly sort-out one specific problem from our file-saving system. And if that doesn't work we could just print it all out and stick in some filing cabinets - there's an idea!"