People
think (possibly based on reading these emails) that only mammals and
birds have workplace difficulties, issues with fax machines, etc etc.
Not so. Introducing Alan the ant.
People
probably know that drones are taking over the world. People think
they'll be used for such noble causes as finding terrorists, delivering
pizzas, and inspecting falcon
nests on office buildings. In fact, most of them will be used to perv
on the neighbourhood.
But
by far the world's biggest number of drones are ants like Alan. There's
estimated to be around 100 trillion ants on the planet, and most of
them are male worker drone ants
like Alan and his mates Bruce, Darrell, Bazza, Dazza, and Gazza, They
make up the Sector 7 crew and just yesterday they had a major problem
with worms in tunnel 4A. Some of the issues they took to their worker's
collective meeting following the incident included:
* Boots and protective equipment for only 2-4 legs, not 6
* Antennae dangerously exposed
* Worms are squishy and big.
* Inappropriate use of some tunnels for personal hygiene - who's in charge here?
* Lack of access to our WHS computer systems
* My thorax is nearly touching the ground
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